Krampus for Christmas part 26

Krampus shoved up dog crap with Christmas glee, packaging each in a nicely wrapped bag you see.  The tossed them down the chimney when Santa was mad, to add something special to tidings joyous and glad.  A special touch the beast added to the holiday.  Krampus's merry mark to a night gentle and gay.

Hurry filled the frigid air it was the day before Christmas all was toil.  The Krampus must polish his chains and boil the oil.  Knives mush be sharp and claws nice and dirty.  There wasn't time for Ms. Deroon no time to be flirty.

Krampus chewed on a bone then gave it to the dog, stretching his arms there were children to flog.  He did some deep bends then touched his toes, Christmas wasn't a time for cramps when you rained down blows.

It wasn't quit dark when the fat man sleighed through the yard, Ho ho'ing to Krampus the fat tub of lard.

Krampus for Christmas part 25

The cops led Krampus through the station thinking him a bum.  He would remember this for coal in the stalkings each and every one.  Once Santa chained the Krampus but shackles wouldn't work.  The monster tore them apart with the smallest little jerk.  All the papers filed they led him to a cell, it was wet and cold and he didn't like the smell.  But in Krampus went and didn't even yell.

Some hours later Krampus ripped off the door, being quiet as he could listening for the Sergent's snore.

Creeping out on a soft padded foot, but sometimes with a cloppy clop coming from his hoof.  His jail break was a success no thanks to old fat Saint Nick.  He may have been his partner but sometimes he was a prick.

Krampus worked home sneaking all the way, Get back to his little house a few hours before light of day.

Krampus for Christmas part 24

Sirens wailed as Krampus cackled through the night.  The last of the cop cars disappearing from sight.   The chase started and was over quick the monster on his motor bike along with Saint Nick.  Claus loosed the Krampus on a Kid from one of the malls.  While visiting Santa he screamed and kicked him in the balls.

These were the nights Krampus loved his Christmas work.  When Father Christmas wasn't a goody goody jerk.  The monster enjoyed being Santa's spite righteously beating kids all through the night.  Krampus pondered a beast work well done, friendly violent fun.

Under the cloudy sky Krampus spied on the house from afar, Santa all the time hid in the motorcycle sidecar. The stockings were hung and they watch the fire crack merry, unaware they were being stalked by someone quit scary.  A Cloven hoof kicked in the door, the police call it a modus operandi.  The children shrieked dropping presents and candy.   The monster grabbed the boy and looked at the mother somewhat randy.  On orders Santa said not a mark, so Krampus beat the bastard with a bag of oranges and tan bark.  After the child moaned in a pulp he looked up at the mom and she gave a loud gulp.The cop cars were her release, who knows what she would have done with the beast.

Krampus for Christmas part 23

Our monster set his dog house with festive delight, rolling out the holly and electric lights.  There was a star and an arrow, gold links garlanded around the tiny house.   He even forced Christmas sweaters on a very frightened mouse. 

His manger was set with more Caganers than two; all trying discreetly to take a Christmas poo.  One looked like john Lennon another like Peggy lee. He searched with out luck for one taking a wee.

Krampus hung wooden raven all along the door.  They were a Christmas tradition from Alaska's chilly shore.  Some he carved with his wicked Krampus claws; other were bought on eBay.  It was all within the law.  The raven represented Jesus to the Tlingit people up north.  Through virgin birth he stolen the sun and for the people brought if forth.

Some would laugh at his metal treetop though hipsters would think it cool. Krampus didn't care, just another way he enjoyed the yule.

Krampus for Christmas part 22

Krampus was a monster and monsters don't use sleighs, instead he drove a motorbike with a side car to make is way.  Santa thought it slow but seeing only bad kids there were fewer stops; not counting the years the economy had a drop.  Tonight he made a special visit to a special house on his list; these kids and parents had Krampus fucking pissed.

The monster hoped for some hint of redemption but expected to see none.  He hunted through the trash for evidence, even more angry when he was done.  Candle carousel angels picked out and thrown with the junk, peering in he saw the now unheavenly toy spinning on a trunk.

The tree was decked out as if nothing was ajar, except the top had no angel not even a star.  Presents were nestled under the tree with care, in the hopes that the winter solstice would soon be there.  Why even try to pretend through the Christmas yule.  Keeping ones own rites was a reason he deeply respected the Jews.  But here they mocked Christmas and said it was actually stolen from them, when in youth Santa  brought them might man and monster and Spirograph with colored pens.

Krampus watched not knowing what to do, he was going to take his time with his vengeance.  It would be awhile until he was through

Krampus for Christmas part 21

Leaning from the sidecar Santa bashed mailboxes swinging a bat.  Krampus laughed and revved the motor making the fat man lose his hat.  The pair sailed down streets laughing and harassing kids and parents too.  You'd be horrified to see what they did at the zoo.  Parents were shocked when Santa flashed them the bird.  Who knew even Santa had hear it's the word.

Krampus bared his hairy rump, Saint Nick offered a Christmasy fist bump.  Elves looked on without a care, the last traces of Christmas jingling from the air.  The day afterword and the deed was done.  Now it was time for Santa and Krampus to have a little fun.

The eleven more days and boxing day would have to wait.  The monster and Kringle didn't much care if they were late.

Krampus for Christmas part 20

Mid November some start playing Christmas tunes, but Krampus had been playing them since June.  He had vinyl and Cd's and an ipod loaded full of his favorite Christmas songs.  Playing carols so early wasn't right but he was happy being wrong. 

Late nights he prowled record shops disguised in a hat and giant coat.  Luckily the customers looked mostly the same and even smelled a little of goat. 

He snapped up Christmas records from country to jazz.  Even progressive rock Christmas with Greg Lake and Patrick Moraz.  He bought more Bing Crosby than anyone shout have.  He was together for Christmas with the muppets and Henry Deutchendorf.  Krampus almost got Hanson but a girl made a quick grab.

Riding home the station played Christmas too, Oakridge Boys Christmas from 1982.  Listening to the music he basked in peace, but soon he would be down to business so he switched on number of the beast. 

Image taken from Nothing is too hard for Bob

Hicks Road Part 2

I am not sure how to describe what this post will be.  I guess it is sort of a pictorial tour of a recent trip over Hicks road.  This is in part to clarify my previous post and in part to give out of town friends a trip down memory lane.

I started from Coleman and Curtner and then quickly made the turn onto hicks.  You can see the light in the picture to the side.  It really doesn't show anything but  if you see this sort of sign you are in the right place. 

early in the drive

Much of the drive is pretty standard country road sort of fair.  It has some climbs and falls but it pretty smooth in the beginning.  On this drive i am starting on the Curtner side and driving into New Almaden.

There are a few houses on the trip and looking left into the creek side there are actually a few horse stables.  The last building on the left is one of these stables. 

Krampus for Christmas part 19

Krampus had a bird on thanksgiving, of which he kept three. The monster wasn't sure if he was Republican or Democrat or even Canadian you see.  But on all he flame broiled a nicely stuffed Tom; Eating it right there with the dog on the lawn.  Krampus wasn't too formal with the feast.  A ping pong table in the back yard was fine for the beast.

The pies were made of jack lanterns long since spoiled. He made the crust from scratch, a long night he toiled. 

The days of the feasts he caught a little nap.  Then waited by the mall and set a little trap.  Black Friday shoppers tasted the best full of thanksgiving dinners from their toes to their chest.  They were concerned with deals not with there kids.  They wouldn't mind just a nibble; so he waited and hid.

Krampus for Christmas part 18

As a monster, Krampus didn't do small talk.  He wasn't a sneak nor was he sly, to him truth was given never a lie.  when he spoke he was hard and forceful yet  Idunn didn't cry.  This girl was not scared and Krampus wanted to know why.

What did she want, the beast still hoped she'd leave.  When she said to be friend Krampus gave her a reprieve.

I'm a monster he said with a growl.  And if your bad I'll eat you, beat you, you'll howl. 

But Idunn stood her ground and still holding out her hand without a sound.

Krampus for Christmas part 17

With watching Krampus for so long Idunn had grown brave and strong.  One day she decided to march down, look the monster in the eye, extend a hand and say hi.  When she did Krampus was confused, Kids should be scared of him, not amused.  At first he huffed then finally he said hello.  Being nice as a monster could through really he wished she'd go.

Idunn introduced herself by name waiting politely for the beast to do the same.  When Krampus finally did it was curt.  Idunn not being afraid, the monster was really hurt. But she kept at him with a smile and the innocence of a child.

Christmas lights glowed around the eaves, with Krampus making small talk hoping the girl would leave.  She had been good and the beast couldn't eat her.  Santa wouldn't allow it of that Krampus was sure. 

Krampus for Christmas part 16

The Ahwahnee held a fine Christmas feast, and all the medieval merriment called to the beast. Krampus visited in the dark of night, knowing his monstrous site would cause a fright. He peered in through the windows cracking as sash, and dinner on left overs and trash. He enjoyed the evening it was all so fun, but where was the terror. Of fear there was none.

The peacock pie had been served to all when Krampus stormed the hall. He battered the house keep and flattened th' lord of misrule. All the fancy dinners would remember this yule. He grabbed a banker and gave him the lash. Buggering his wife with a rod made of ash.

When all the nice banners lay broken and torn, Krampus flew away his welcome growing worn. Hooting and hollering a menacing "Grus vom Krampus" that night.

Richard Scarry's Puzzletown part 2

I recently noticed an auction that included some puzzletown pieces I did not recognize.  Looking into the auction I found they were not actually Richard Scarry but rather Sesame street themed.  Intrigued I started doing some research.  Apparently in 1977 Playskool created the second round of Richard Scarry sets, as well as this Sesame Street set.  The official product name was Sesame Street Neighborhood.  I was able to win the auction and was told the woodboard pieces work just fine with the puzzletown grid floors.  I will keep you updated when I get my package.

Here is a link to someone selling the toy that does a good job of describing the product.  It seems to work a little differently  being designed to use woodboard cut outs as the figures rather than those of the Richard Scarry sets.  Sesame street uses little green feet pieces that hold the character pieces.

The houses themselves use foot and roof system.  The roofs are single piece rather than build, as in the Richard scarry sets.


My original post on puzzletown can be found HERE

I just wrote up a third post on puzzletown and you can find it HERE 

There is also a brand new post here. 

Krampus for Christmas part 15

With all the carolling and shopping Krampus paid a visit to the mall.  A lone monster was too few for the task, so he gathered young men and for each a mask.  Furry suits, chains, a bell.  He thought his army of Kampusse looked just swell.  They stormed the Spencer's and Orange Julius stores, spanking all the maidens dress up like whores.  Young kids were mostly spared but if they weren't the parents wouldn't have cared.  In line for Santa they were mostly brats and deserved a few swings from the Krampusse's bats.  When security came Krampus gave a call and the shaggy gang fled the mall.

Bron Yr Aur

drawing up all the things I love I fell into the car.  Gathering my connections and setting them to place.  Not in leaving but in reminding and telling. Telling the loved of places once loved and remembered.  Streets shadowed with tales high and bold, that fall short when tried to be told.  Hills dark in dusk laid out like a golden breast made smokey with forgotten fires upon behest.

Krampus for Christmas part 14

Great claws turned over a tasty shank and pulled off a forgotten sneaker with a yank.  The monster was cooked up a mouth watering stew with an ill behaved eight year old or two.  He threw them in cloths and all, merrily chuckling when they started to bawl.  Then Krampus tossed onions and kale; tasting the soup to the last of the wails.  Finally done Krampus thought, boiled up kids sure hit the spot.

T'was a special feast for Leif Erickson's day. Though Krampus was Germanic , he feasted anyway.  Odin was a friend from long ago, he hadn't seen him lately;  why he didn't know.  He dressed up a viking and pillaged neighborhood trash finally coming home with a rash.

Working on a chain gang

The more I have been involved in the Scrum process the more I begin to question it.  While I think the small teams and close work is great, I question if the process is sustainable.  Also the chaos implicit to Scrum makes it difficult for QA to maintain standard checks and balances. 

I see something of the drive to turn people into machines in both of these problems, but more so the problem with sustaining a scrum team.  People are great at self organization for change, that is the base state of every ecosystem; not balance.  This makes scrum the magic bullet to many problems.  Rip down the bs and let people do, it works every time.  Maintaining this is where it falls apart.  The goal must be greater than the individual and people come together and succeed. 

In the on going work of several scrum sprints the individual begins to reassert itself.  This is where I see problems, at least for high level team members.  When you are focused on functional work you are diminishing your strategic and growth level tasks.  In throwing out process scrum also throws out career growth, beyond senior levels at least. I feel even HR must embrace Scrum and modify career path if scrum teams are to continue beyond a year and a half.

Turning to QA.  I am a quality assurance engineer so it is my focus in Scrum.  In our team we are often executing work of a similar nature, to add speed we have thrown out test cases as the work is very similar from instance to instance.  Really this is not a good thing, we are discarding solid qa practices for execution. It works again because we are cogs in a repeating machine.  When we do tackle a new project we often stumble for not having used those very tools we have discarded.  

Krampus for Christmas part 13

Krampus broke down the door, storming into the room.  Throwing over a table which landed with a boom.  Some kids fled in terror others shrieked in fright.  It was only Idunn who squeeled in delight.  He gave only a glance bounding toward Miss Deroon.  He hefted her up and sprang from the room.  To the window tearing up the sash, it exploded with a crash.

Ms Teacher had been bad and Krampus had the cure. It was a punishment she would enjoy of that be sure.  I wasn't the date she envisioned after Krampus saved her at the bar, but it was one she liked more by far.

Hello its me

I sort of messed up with my wife the other night.  I went off to do my role playing game instead of helping her when she needed me.   I feel like crap about it.  I am just so dumb when it comes to that sort of thing.  Its like I don't get any of the clues even when they are screamed at me.  I don't know why people are such a mystery to me.  It's like I am an alien and I just don't understand even though I have been watching all my life.  I want to be a kind person, well no really I don't.  I want to love the people I love and treat them great.  I am content being an observer to the people I don't. 

I know its hard to get through to me, Sometimes its just as hard for me to get something out.  Its like there is a wall between me and people and I want my people to know I love them and don't want to be this way.  

I acted live a fool before when something came up with the gaming and now my wife wont tell me when she needs.  I feel like a jack ass whenever this comes up and it keeps coming up.  I wish planet Jim got the messages from planet Earth.

Tin Man

Lift this sunward veil and Let me enchant this spell.  Draw out the sage and straw from the hills and send them to me.  Give me a cold wind after weary day, I'm wary of oncoming light.  Dream come up on my waking, existent only in night.  Scarecrow give me warning if I'm headed wrong.  Don't tell me to the morning of two suns in the sky.  Moon mirror my heart now radiate like a secret sun, on all the day is done. Scarecrow give me warning