On Burns night Krampus supped with Bigfoot, out in the woods. Few knew Sasquatch was Scottish! They had a haggis though Krampus was sure it no good. Compared to haggis even Ludefisk tasted sweet. It seemed losing a dare the only reason to eat.
Sasquatch was gracious inviting Krampus into his home. During the serving Bigfoot even recited a poem. Then a speech and several many toasts. Krampus brought a few drams of scotch for his seldom seen host.
Our beast sighed sad with a toast to the lasses. There were none and how Krampus hoped to pinch them on the asses. Not since sausage in October was such a fest, but For a friend he made the best.
This the last night for Christmas feel far into the new year. Krampus would be happy for some sleep forgetting the Yule without fear. He soured on after Christmas office parties, they needed no help going bad. Krampus finally though of Christmas having all that could be had.
I just posting a few random works of poetry, prose, rants and thoughts. Roleplaying, Video Games, Metal and Progressive Rock are themes woven through my posts. Also the blog serves as the home for my fledgling yuletide story, Krampus for Christmas. No Churnalism, No Journalism, simply opinions stated as facts!
Friday, September 30, 2011
Thursday, September 29, 2011
More Krampus crap
Hi I have added some of my own craptastic illustrations to the Krampus for Christmas page. I am writing for fun and don't have the disposable income to pay some one for pictures. In looking at blogs out there I saw 75 bucks an hour as a price for art, I don't know how long drawing takes for pro's but one pic of Krampus for a hundred bucks is crazy.
I have no illusions about my ability, can draw enough to give someone wan idea of what I am looking for. That is where my skill ends. If you are an artist and work for less let me know.
Thanks
Jim Rickel
I have no illusions about my ability, can draw enough to give someone wan idea of what I am looking for. That is where my skill ends. If you are an artist and work for less let me know.
Thanks
Jim Rickel
Krampus for Christmas part 43
Krampus wasn't and elf nor good with his hands but krampus helped charity in ways he can. Big toy stores all filled with Christmas rush, Krampus encouraged shoppers donate or blood would gush.
At Christmas toys for tots left out a bin, Krampus made sure each and every person tossed a couple of toys in. The monster didn't talk or say a word, just swished his switch lightly the message clearly heard. A couple of teenagers tried to sneak by they were unhurt mostly, just a blackened eye.
One night Idunn trotted up with an unwrapped toy, the monster cracked a little smile to the girls bounding joy. Her parents hurried off worried Krampus may eat her, but Idunn knew there was no reason to fear.
At Christmas toys for tots left out a bin, Krampus made sure each and every person tossed a couple of toys in. The monster didn't talk or say a word, just swished his switch lightly the message clearly heard. A couple of teenagers tried to sneak by they were unhurt mostly, just a blackened eye.
One night Idunn trotted up with an unwrapped toy, the monster cracked a little smile to the girls bounding joy. Her parents hurried off worried Krampus may eat her, but Idunn knew there was no reason to fear.
Krampus for Christmas part 42
Krampus held a few managers in a hole for a few weeks. It was dark with spiders and long ago started to reek. The monster whipped them every few nights, those the only moments they saw light.
In a meeting they decided no party for the Yule, the reason; the economy had been very cruel. Wisely giving themselves a raise for all the money they had saved. None thought of spending their own dime. The workers would understand, they would be fine.
They denied a small Christmas thanks, a crime Krampus though rank. This wasn't charity it was earned, Krampus's monstrous fury burned.
Our Beast heard of this rounded up the villains. Lashing entitled asses until blood was spillin. One soiled himself for which Krampus took a kidney, mailing it overnight to a dialysis patient in Sydney.
In a meeting they decided no party for the Yule, the reason; the economy had been very cruel. Wisely giving themselves a raise for all the money they had saved. None thought of spending their own dime. The workers would understand, they would be fine.
They denied a small Christmas thanks, a crime Krampus though rank. This wasn't charity it was earned, Krampus's monstrous fury burned.
Our Beast heard of this rounded up the villains. Lashing entitled asses until blood was spillin. One soiled himself for which Krampus took a kidney, mailing it overnight to a dialysis patient in Sydney.
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
Krampus for Christmas part 41
The blood moon found our beast hunting about the streets alone. Not Christmas, he couldn't touch kids still he hungered for meat and bone. He tried for cats but they had claws and were to quick for his paws. Raccoons were tasty but far too sly, he was about to give up when an opossum caught his eye. The critter was ugly and mean and the possum too.
These pouched rodents were a little dumb and Krampus felt and idea starting to come. He got some cat food and rigged a trap then waited for the vermin taking a little nap. Hours later bang came from box, reaching in he found a fat kid crying in shock. Krampus pulled him up eye to eye, snarling as the kid continued to cry.
"Whats your name child, be quick don't lie" "Paul Pickle" he stammered dropping his eyes. Krampus remembered him from the goodie list. Krampus couldn't take a nibble now he was really pissed.
Krampus sent him on his way warning to avoid his snares. If fatty got home it wasn't one of Krampus cares. He finally got a wood rat and a few crows. Not a bad stew as far as roadkill goes.
These pouched rodents were a little dumb and Krampus felt and idea starting to come. He got some cat food and rigged a trap then waited for the vermin taking a little nap. Hours later bang came from box, reaching in he found a fat kid crying in shock. Krampus pulled him up eye to eye, snarling as the kid continued to cry.
"Whats your name child, be quick don't lie" "Paul Pickle" he stammered dropping his eyes. Krampus remembered him from the goodie list. Krampus couldn't take a nibble now he was really pissed.
Krampus sent him on his way warning to avoid his snares. If fatty got home it wasn't one of Krampus cares. He finally got a wood rat and a few crows. Not a bad stew as far as roadkill goes.
Krampus for Christmas part 40
Again in the yard Krampus places a Christmas scene. Jesus in nativity all glowing in saintly sheen. Mary and Joseph stood nearly four foot tall. Hand carved by Krampus not the crap you get at the mall. The beast was Bavarian and woodwork in his soul. Even Santa elves would be proud of his toil.
Lights shone like a beacon calling onlookers there. To wonder at the jolly house and the Christmas in the air. He stole a donkey and a couple of merry pigs, corralling them in the yard quit impressive digs.
The neighbors would soon come to see his work, Krampus hoped on his bike kick starting with a jerk. Fleeing the scene the monster smiled proud tearing of with the motor running loud. Back home he wondered what Idunn mights say to a night. He would tell her later and see if she trembled in Krampus fright
Lights shone like a beacon calling onlookers there. To wonder at the jolly house and the Christmas in the air. He stole a donkey and a couple of merry pigs, corralling them in the yard quit impressive digs.
The neighbors would soon come to see his work, Krampus hoped on his bike kick starting with a jerk. Fleeing the scene the monster smiled proud tearing of with the motor running loud. Back home he wondered what Idunn mights say to a night. He would tell her later and see if she trembled in Krampus fright
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Krampus for Christmas part 39
Silent and stoic Krampus finally took the little girls hand. The beast asked "why aren't you afraid. Like any little girl would?" Idunn thought a moment "I can pretend; do you think I should?" Krampus snarled disgusted at himself. "She thinks I'm funny silly like an elf!"
The girl told of her watching so many months, even of flowing his little hunts. How after time the monster was a matter of fact, she even accused the kid eats was just an act.
"No" the beast roared, I'd eat you if allowed. Krampus monstered and menaced and furled his brow. Idunn just laughed and hugged a hairy leg. "How did a monster scare this girl did he have to beg?" She was unrelenting and determined; wouldn't bend. Krampus finally was forced to let her be his friend.
The girl told of her watching so many months, even of flowing his little hunts. How after time the monster was a matter of fact, she even accused the kid eats was just an act.
"No" the beast roared, I'd eat you if allowed. Krampus monstered and menaced and furled his brow. Idunn just laughed and hugged a hairy leg. "How did a monster scare this girl did he have to beg?" She was unrelenting and determined; wouldn't bend. Krampus finally was forced to let her be his friend.
Krampus for Christmas part 38
The gang broken into the movie house interrupting the show. It was something about Pine tree Vermont hoping it was going to snow. The monstrous band lashed the crowd howling for their blood. Krampus himself mauled the Mayor he was know for graft and sling of the mud.
The Krampusse devoured the concession stand even if the popcorn sort of stale. Glass and candy was scattered on the floor. Everything gone, Krampus smiled contently upon the gore.
It was a gala night before the carnage came, now the rich of the splendid town lay broken and in pain. Krampus knew most were crooks and got what they deserved. He was happy for the Jolly backdrop on which his vengeance was served.
The Krampusse devoured the concession stand even if the popcorn sort of stale. Glass and candy was scattered on the floor. Everything gone, Krampus smiled contently upon the gore.
It was a gala night before the carnage came, now the rich of the splendid town lay broken and in pain. Krampus knew most were crooks and got what they deserved. He was happy for the Jolly backdrop on which his vengeance was served.
Monday, September 26, 2011
Everything you want
Streetlights infuse and turn the night into day. Taking this sea of streets and turning it hollow and cold; this land is new pushed back from the bold. The wilderness sinks back into vague scents of sage at the edges of mind. These things only take meaning to those in desperate need and it goes away unless there is something greatly wrong. Driving with some need that defines and sets me apart. I'm in with memory hoping for meaning but these are not really there anymore. Birds take wing off the night in some hoping gasp of flight, but I am one of broken wing left in yearning. Far from home i'm hoping for return.
Krampus for Christmas part 37
Krampus worked with an elf on Christmas Eve. The monster did the dirty work and elf flew with Santa keeping a few tricks up his sleeve. He delivered a special package for Krampus, if things went bad. Even good kids had biting dogs or stale cookies which made Santa mad. With a word down the chime a present was tossed, smelling the aftermath your lunch was lost.
This elf wasn't Hermie though he was interested in teeth. He hoped to pull them from kids and make a wreath. He never though himself Krampus he wouldn't dare, he just hoped to be a fitting heir. Besides he wasn't furry he hadn't the hair.
They called him Piet in his wintry home, few wanted to meet him being alone. On Christmas he radioed Krampus if there was a change of plans. They had their own frequency not using citizen bands. If a house turned bad, or rarely good, Krampus radioed back that he heard and understood.
This elf wasn't Hermie though he was interested in teeth. He hoped to pull them from kids and make a wreath. He never though himself Krampus he wouldn't dare, he just hoped to be a fitting heir. Besides he wasn't furry he hadn't the hair.
They called him Piet in his wintry home, few wanted to meet him being alone. On Christmas he radioed Krampus if there was a change of plans. They had their own frequency not using citizen bands. If a house turned bad, or rarely good, Krampus radioed back that he heard and understood.
Krampus for Christmas part 36
The teacher rolled over throwing an arm over the brute, it was a wild night there was no refute. Miss Deroon stroked Krampus's furry chest, Her night with the savage monster had been her best.
Clothes cast about the torn into shreds, She wondered if she'd need a new bed. She happily laughs with Krampus stroking her hair in his paws. For a monster he was gentle never scratching her with his wicked claws.
Krampus tongue drooped out as it often did, She enjoyed this to under the covers where they hid. Then the beast fried up eggs; breakfast was important to start the day. With a hug and kiss they each were on their way.
Clothes cast about the torn into shreds, She wondered if she'd need a new bed. She happily laughs with Krampus stroking her hair in his paws. For a monster he was gentle never scratching her with his wicked claws.
Krampus tongue drooped out as it often did, She enjoyed this to under the covers where they hid. Then the beast fried up eggs; breakfast was important to start the day. With a hug and kiss they each were on their way.
Sunday, September 25, 2011
Krampus Collected
Hi i have collected, cleaned up and reorganized the Krampus for Christmas story. I hope it makes a little more since now. I work in notepad and then just copy up here with no edits most of the time. I have pulled out the Halloween section as I want to rework it. I will be adding in some of my own, pathetic, illustrations over the next few days.
I really need to hook up with an artist to get this from my head to reality. If you are an artist and interested in illustrating my crap please contact me.
I am also looking for feedback on the story if you have anything you want to say please let me know. I am just working in a vacuum currently. I really don't have the full Krampus story at hand so I am just appropriating him for my own devices.
Here is a link to Krampus for Christmas
Please send your thoughts to jameslrickel@gmail.com
I really need to hook up with an artist to get this from my head to reality. If you are an artist and interested in illustrating my crap please contact me.
I am also looking for feedback on the story if you have anything you want to say please let me know. I am just working in a vacuum currently. I really don't have the full Krampus story at hand so I am just appropriating him for my own devices.
Here is a link to Krampus for Christmas
Please send your thoughts to jameslrickel@gmail.com
Friday, September 23, 2011
Krampus for Christmas part 35
On some nights Krampus just watched TV buy the first at home. Though usually a fire he set and the house not his own. Our monster wasn't above arson to what a favorite show and they only play A Christmas Story a few times you know.
Krampus happy for whoville when good turned the Grinch. He thought the sad little tree would do in a pinch. The monster chimed along so angels got their wings. He even watch a Cailliou Christmas though he hated the thing.
With a fire still blazing the cops came around ringing out their sirens a terrible sound. Krampus lingers a little long, a copper banged him on the head with a billy club knocking him out with a KABONG.
Krampus happy for whoville when good turned the Grinch. He thought the sad little tree would do in a pinch. The monster chimed along so angels got their wings. He even watch a Cailliou Christmas though he hated the thing.
With a fire still blazing the cops came around ringing out their sirens a terrible sound. Krampus lingers a little long, a copper banged him on the head with a billy club knocking him out with a KABONG.
Thursday, September 22, 2011
Krampus for Christmas part 34
With the power on elves hammered out toys in a sweatshop for the good girls and boys. Reindeer trotted in a stable each in a stall in animatronic Christmas scenes once owned by the mall. Some new others old and dingy, they should be cleaned but the city was stingy.
A forest of lighted trees decks by local clubs, would shine merrily lighting the way to local pubs. Hours later the sausage stand watered Krampus's maw. He found a few left over links in a can with trash and straws.
The monster smiled remembering the traditions start. A gift from the cities mortician, the irony was not lost in Krampus's heart. Chilly air gust odd for a city of the bay, a drop of rain sent our beast upon his way.
This fits in somewhere in the bit talking about christmas in the park
A forest of lighted trees decks by local clubs, would shine merrily lighting the way to local pubs. Hours later the sausage stand watered Krampus's maw. He found a few left over links in a can with trash and straws.
The monster smiled remembering the traditions start. A gift from the cities mortician, the irony was not lost in Krampus's heart. Chilly air gust odd for a city of the bay, a drop of rain sent our beast upon his way.
This fits in somewhere in the bit talking about christmas in the park
Krampus for Christmas part 33
Add caption |
Krampus had different styles and themes loading his shelves, even Japanese knee hugging elves. He could put on a sixties lounge Christmas with glitz and flair, even a sad little forties Christmas when war was in the air.
The monster had Sears wish book from every year, yes he had Montgomery Wards and Penny's you needn't fear. Some had toys circled, he would have liked as a lad; but Krampus never got presents he was Always bad.
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
Krampus for Christmas part 32
Krampus gathered pumpkins after Halloween half smashed on the road. He left them rotting on his window sill until they were three weeks to old. From them baking thanksgiving pie, with home make crust that drew many flies.
Yams were hand smashed and candied golden brown, soaked in syrup so sweet it was hard to get down. Scallop corn and stuffing rounded out the meal, It was so heavy anyone else would be sick, bu Krampus heaped on seconds and thirds with a happy squeal.
Who knows what part kids played in the feast, he may have ground their bones to make the biscuit yeast. There was some doubt as it was before the season, but Krampus knew a butcher with meats for every reason.
This fits in somewhere with the thanksgiving scene
Yams were hand smashed and candied golden brown, soaked in syrup so sweet it was hard to get down. Scallop corn and stuffing rounded out the meal, It was so heavy anyone else would be sick, bu Krampus heaped on seconds and thirds with a happy squeal.
Who knows what part kids played in the feast, he may have ground their bones to make the biscuit yeast. There was some doubt as it was before the season, but Krampus knew a butcher with meats for every reason.
This fits in somewhere with the thanksgiving scene
Krampus for Christmas part 31
Krampus enjoyed the Siberian metal Christmas and wished he could attend the show, but to that Fresh Aire Christmas flatly said no. We was left luke warm with saxophone Christmas by Kenny G. The monster had no use for Bocelli. The new sung Christmas records kept less than they missed.
A Vince Guaraldi Christmas really put the beast in a Christmas mood. To such pleasant jazzy sounds the monster couldn't menace or brood.
Some Canadian had a song about a winters night, that Krampus felt really got the tidings right. He liked a song The greedies had made, he even liked one that talked about being Slade.
This fits in with the bit with krampus buying records
A Vince Guaraldi Christmas really put the beast in a Christmas mood. To such pleasant jazzy sounds the monster couldn't menace or brood.
Some Canadian had a song about a winters night, that Krampus felt really got the tidings right. He liked a song The greedies had made, he even liked one that talked about being Slade.
This fits in with the bit with krampus buying records
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Krampus for Christmas part 30
Even with lessons some folks don't learn, soon than later another visit was earned. Krampus again waited deep in the night, to catch the family in solstice eve'y delight. This time he took the chimney breaking it apart, then bursting in like Santa only evil and dark. The fire cracked with a bright Krampus plum then burning logs flew into the room.
Krampus cackled grabbing the boy, taking a bite for his ear with pugilistic joy. Next was the girl caning her ass, this year she was a bitchy condescending young lass.
Daddy was punched and knocked out his wind, Mommy took a switch right in the end. Their phone list at last Krampus took, to visit their friends according to the book. Lastly Krampus set the manger after strolled out the door, after all it was the reason Christmas was for.
Krampus cackled grabbing the boy, taking a bite for his ear with pugilistic joy. Next was the girl caning her ass, this year she was a bitchy condescending young lass.
Daddy was punched and knocked out his wind, Mommy took a switch right in the end. Their phone list at last Krampus took, to visit their friends according to the book. Lastly Krampus set the manger after strolled out the door, after all it was the reason Christmas was for.
Krampus for Christmas part 29
Krampus claws at the windows menacing the kids, In terror looking outside, krampus cast only a shadow monstrously whilst he hid. Later scrapping glass with hideous huge claws, Children fled in horror waking parents to call the Law. The Beast disappeared for a moment, hoping mad parents would do his work. But these were the sorts that didn't spank bad children, you know them as jerks.
Well tucked in with water, told it was only dreams; Krampus smiled in their windows delighting in their screams. They made Dad check for prowlers all through the yard. Krampus left a present that Daddy stepped in runny not at all hard. Garden hose washing his foot proved to be a chore, He didn't notice our monster slipping in the door.
The next morning the house was a mess, Krampus had out done himself but it was only a start I must confess. Stockings were filled with a gift know one liked, The monster had disassembled the kids riding bikes. A pillow was left in the middle of the living room, out of place, slightly wet and giving off fumes. He places a fair angel at the top of the tree, topping off the water when he needed to take a wee.
To the carousel Krampus returned the angels rescued from the trash. Finally leaving he threw open the door with a crash.
Well tucked in with water, told it was only dreams; Krampus smiled in their windows delighting in their screams. They made Dad check for prowlers all through the yard. Krampus left a present that Daddy stepped in runny not at all hard. Garden hose washing his foot proved to be a chore, He didn't notice our monster slipping in the door.
The next morning the house was a mess, Krampus had out done himself but it was only a start I must confess. Stockings were filled with a gift know one liked, The monster had disassembled the kids riding bikes. A pillow was left in the middle of the living room, out of place, slightly wet and giving off fumes. He places a fair angel at the top of the tree, topping off the water when he needed to take a wee.
To the carousel Krampus returned the angels rescued from the trash. Finally leaving he threw open the door with a crash.
Cinema
Some time ago I wrote about my perceived laziness of the Stanford Theatre. Now I would like to mention a Theater that seems to be kicking all sorts of ass, The Bal Theatre. The Bal is an older theater that has gone through the Bay Area theater life cycle of first run, discount, and most recently Indian films. But now it has been resurrected if you will. Now it is hosting event film nights that are awesome.
For Halloween they are teaming up with a Bay Area film events and someone calling himself Lord Blood-Rah, to deliver two special nights of Halloween films. Exactly the sort of thing I was hoping for from the Stanford Theatre.
Bay Area film events is a group that is dedicated to making movies fun again. They do large events that take an obscure genre and do the hell out of it. They have done fantastic events with Godzilla and Ultraman. They even brought in people in suits to battle on stage. They seem to be hell bent on making the Bal the source for great geek film events in the bay area. More power to them I say.
Lord Blood Rah is a horror film host in the vein of Bob Wilkins. I was pretty young and had pretty weird parents, so I didn't see much of Creature Feature as a lad. I knew Mr. Wilkens as captain cosmic the host of the afternoon kids block. They had some great Japanese series like the above mentioned Ultraman and sort of geared many of us unsuspecting kids into scifi. Blood-Rah is more traditional in his approach taking on a character similar to Uncle Creepy from the comics. He hosts films with stories and trailer reels. He is not the full blown spook show host that seems to do a show far beyond the movie itself. It's a bit of a shame I would like to see something like that.
I whole heartedly hope you take a look at the Bal and make a trip to one of their events.
For Halloween they are teaming up with a Bay Area film events and someone calling himself Lord Blood-Rah, to deliver two special nights of Halloween films. Exactly the sort of thing I was hoping for from the Stanford Theatre.
Bay Area film events is a group that is dedicated to making movies fun again. They do large events that take an obscure genre and do the hell out of it. They have done fantastic events with Godzilla and Ultraman. They even brought in people in suits to battle on stage. They seem to be hell bent on making the Bal the source for great geek film events in the bay area. More power to them I say.
Lord Blood Rah is a horror film host in the vein of Bob Wilkins. I was pretty young and had pretty weird parents, so I didn't see much of Creature Feature as a lad. I knew Mr. Wilkens as captain cosmic the host of the afternoon kids block. They had some great Japanese series like the above mentioned Ultraman and sort of geared many of us unsuspecting kids into scifi. Blood-Rah is more traditional in his approach taking on a character similar to Uncle Creepy from the comics. He hosts films with stories and trailer reels. He is not the full blown spook show host that seems to do a show far beyond the movie itself. It's a bit of a shame I would like to see something like that.
I whole heartedly hope you take a look at the Bal and make a trip to one of their events.
Monday, September 19, 2011
Krampus for Christmas part 28
Krampus tore at a tuba player and wrapped brass about him like a bow. The monster preferred guitar, this was a critique of the show. Pipers and players neither were spared, Flutes rammed down throats and up other places; you would have glared.
His hoof smashed tables shattering plates, If you love carnage you'd say it just great. Blows fell a busboy, he was embezzling from the bar. Krampus's switch lashed the evil, them running near and far. The beast was on them with a bound, whips and cries a musical sound.
A little more for the scene at the Ahwanhee
His hoof smashed tables shattering plates, If you love carnage you'd say it just great. Blows fell a busboy, he was embezzling from the bar. Krampus's switch lashed the evil, them running near and far. The beast was on them with a bound, whips and cries a musical sound.
A little more for the scene at the Ahwanhee
Krampus for Christmas part 27
After the rampage streets were upended, trash cans dumped over flattened and bended. The monster howled and roar through the night, Waking up toddlers to no parents delight.
If anything it was a warning a reminder he prowled. More children awoke crying each time he howled. Perhaps they'd be better knowing he was about, So again he roared with a beastly shout.
Around houses were bad kids dwelled he looked for a tree. Lifting his leg like a dog and left a pee. It smelled of brimestone oh very foul. heading off to the next house with a satisfied growl.
On some houses claws carved little runes, festive viking warnings Christmas was coming soon. This year it would bring something dark, Krampus chuckled after leaving his mark.
If anything it was a warning a reminder he prowled. More children awoke crying each time he howled. Perhaps they'd be better knowing he was about, So again he roared with a beastly shout.
Around houses were bad kids dwelled he looked for a tree. Lifting his leg like a dog and left a pee. It smelled of brimestone oh very foul. heading off to the next house with a satisfied growl.
On some houses claws carved little runes, festive viking warnings Christmas was coming soon. This year it would bring something dark, Krampus chuckled after leaving his mark.
Friday, September 16, 2011
Krampus for Christmas part 26
Krampus shoved up dog crap with Christmas glee, packaging each in a nicely wrapped bag you see. The tossed them down the chimney when Santa was mad, to add something special to tidings joyous and glad. A special touch the beast added to the holiday. Krampus's merry mark to a night gentle and gay.
Hurry filled the frigid air it was the day before Christmas all was toil. The Krampus must polish his chains and boil the oil. Knives mush be sharp and claws nice and dirty. There wasn't time for Ms. Deroon no time to be flirty.
Krampus chewed on a bone then gave it to the dog, stretching his arms there were children to flog. He did some deep bends then touched his toes, Christmas wasn't a time for cramps when you rained down blows.
It wasn't quit dark when the fat man sleighed through the yard, Ho ho'ing to Krampus the fat tub of lard.
Hurry filled the frigid air it was the day before Christmas all was toil. The Krampus must polish his chains and boil the oil. Knives mush be sharp and claws nice and dirty. There wasn't time for Ms. Deroon no time to be flirty.
Krampus chewed on a bone then gave it to the dog, stretching his arms there were children to flog. He did some deep bends then touched his toes, Christmas wasn't a time for cramps when you rained down blows.
It wasn't quit dark when the fat man sleighed through the yard, Ho ho'ing to Krampus the fat tub of lard.
Thursday, September 15, 2011
Krampus for Christmas part 25
The cops led Krampus through the station thinking him a bum. He would remember this for coal in the stalkings each and every one. Once Santa chained the Krampus but shackles wouldn't work. The monster tore them apart with the smallest little jerk. All the papers filed they led him to a cell, it was wet and cold and he didn't like the smell. But in Krampus went and didn't even yell.
Some hours later Krampus ripped off the door, being quiet as he could listening for the Sergent's snore.
Creeping out on a soft padded foot, but sometimes with a cloppy clop coming from his hoof. His jail break was a success no thanks to old fat Saint Nick. He may have been his partner but sometimes he was a prick.
Krampus worked home sneaking all the way, Get back to his little house a few hours before light of day.
Some hours later Krampus ripped off the door, being quiet as he could listening for the Sergent's snore.
Creeping out on a soft padded foot, but sometimes with a cloppy clop coming from his hoof. His jail break was a success no thanks to old fat Saint Nick. He may have been his partner but sometimes he was a prick.
Krampus worked home sneaking all the way, Get back to his little house a few hours before light of day.
Krampus for Christmas part 24
Sirens wailed as Krampus cackled through the night. The last of the cop cars disappearing from sight. The chase started and was over quick the monster on his motor bike along with Saint Nick. Claus loosed the Krampus on a Kid from one of the malls. While visiting Santa he screamed and kicked him in the balls.
These were the nights Krampus loved his Christmas work. When Father Christmas wasn't a goody goody jerk. The monster enjoyed being Santa's spite righteously beating kids all through the night. Krampus pondered a beast work well done, friendly violent fun.
Under the cloudy sky Krampus spied on the house from afar, Santa all the time hid in the motorcycle sidecar. The stockings were hung and they watch the fire crack merry, unaware they were being stalked by someone quit scary. A Cloven hoof kicked in the door, the police call it a modus operandi. The children shrieked dropping presents and candy. The monster grabbed the boy and looked at the mother somewhat randy. On orders Santa said not a mark, so Krampus beat the bastard with a bag of oranges and tan bark. After the child moaned in a pulp he looked up at the mom and she gave a loud gulp.The cop cars were her release, who knows what she would have done with the beast.
These were the nights Krampus loved his Christmas work. When Father Christmas wasn't a goody goody jerk. The monster enjoyed being Santa's spite righteously beating kids all through the night. Krampus pondered a beast work well done, friendly violent fun.
Under the cloudy sky Krampus spied on the house from afar, Santa all the time hid in the motorcycle sidecar. The stockings were hung and they watch the fire crack merry, unaware they were being stalked by someone quit scary. A Cloven hoof kicked in the door, the police call it a modus operandi. The children shrieked dropping presents and candy. The monster grabbed the boy and looked at the mother somewhat randy. On orders Santa said not a mark, so Krampus beat the bastard with a bag of oranges and tan bark. After the child moaned in a pulp he looked up at the mom and she gave a loud gulp.The cop cars were her release, who knows what she would have done with the beast.
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Krampus for Christmas part 23
Our monster set his dog house with festive delight, rolling out the holly and electric lights. There was a star and an arrow, gold links garlanded around the tiny house. He even forced Christmas sweaters on a very frightened mouse.
His manger was set with more Caganers than two; all trying discreetly to take a Christmas poo. One looked like john Lennon another like Peggy lee. He searched with out luck for one taking a wee.
Krampus hung wooden raven all along the door. They were a Christmas tradition from Alaska's chilly shore. Some he carved with his wicked Krampus claws; other were bought on eBay. It was all within the law. The raven represented Jesus to the Tlingit people up north. Through virgin birth he stolen the sun and for the people brought if forth.
Some would laugh at his metal treetop though hipsters would think it cool. Krampus didn't care, just another way he enjoyed the yule.
His manger was set with more Caganers than two; all trying discreetly to take a Christmas poo. One looked like john Lennon another like Peggy lee. He searched with out luck for one taking a wee.
Krampus hung wooden raven all along the door. They were a Christmas tradition from Alaska's chilly shore. Some he carved with his wicked Krampus claws; other were bought on eBay. It was all within the law. The raven represented Jesus to the Tlingit people up north. Through virgin birth he stolen the sun and for the people brought if forth.
Some would laugh at his metal treetop though hipsters would think it cool. Krampus didn't care, just another way he enjoyed the yule.
Krampus for Christmas part 22
Krampus was a monster and monsters don't use sleighs, instead he drove a motorbike with a side car to make is way. Santa thought it slow but seeing only bad kids there were fewer stops; not counting the years the economy had a drop. Tonight he made a special visit to a special house on his list; these kids and parents had Krampus fucking pissed.
The monster hoped for some hint of redemption but expected to see none. He hunted through the trash for evidence, even more angry when he was done. Candle carousel angels picked out and thrown with the junk, peering in he saw the now unheavenly toy spinning on a trunk.
The tree was decked out as if nothing was ajar, except the top had no angel not even a star. Presents were nestled under the tree with care, in the hopes that the winter solstice would soon be there. Why even try to pretend through the Christmas yule. Keeping ones own rites was a reason he deeply respected the Jews. But here they mocked Christmas and said it was actually stolen from them, when in youth Santa brought them might man and monster and Spirograph with colored pens.
Krampus watched not knowing what to do, he was going to take his time with his vengeance. It would be awhile until he was through
The monster hoped for some hint of redemption but expected to see none. He hunted through the trash for evidence, even more angry when he was done. Candle carousel angels picked out and thrown with the junk, peering in he saw the now unheavenly toy spinning on a trunk.
The tree was decked out as if nothing was ajar, except the top had no angel not even a star. Presents were nestled under the tree with care, in the hopes that the winter solstice would soon be there. Why even try to pretend through the Christmas yule. Keeping ones own rites was a reason he deeply respected the Jews. But here they mocked Christmas and said it was actually stolen from them, when in youth Santa brought them might man and monster and Spirograph with colored pens.
Krampus watched not knowing what to do, he was going to take his time with his vengeance. It would be awhile until he was through
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
Krampus for Christmas part 21
Leaning from the sidecar Santa bashed mailboxes swinging a bat. Krampus laughed and revved the motor making the fat man lose his hat. The pair sailed down streets laughing and harassing kids and parents too. You'd be horrified to see what they did at the zoo. Parents were shocked when Santa flashed them the bird. Who knew even Santa had hear it's the word.
Krampus bared his hairy rump, Saint Nick offered a Christmasy fist bump. Elves looked on without a care, the last traces of Christmas jingling from the air. The day afterword and the deed was done. Now it was time for Santa and Krampus to have a little fun.
The eleven more days and boxing day would have to wait. The monster and Kringle didn't much care if they were late.
Krampus bared his hairy rump, Saint Nick offered a Christmasy fist bump. Elves looked on without a care, the last traces of Christmas jingling from the air. The day afterword and the deed was done. Now it was time for Santa and Krampus to have a little fun.
The eleven more days and boxing day would have to wait. The monster and Kringle didn't much care if they were late.
Krampus for Christmas part 20
Mid November some start playing Christmas tunes, but Krampus had been playing them since June. He had vinyl and Cd's and an ipod loaded full of his favorite Christmas songs. Playing carols so early wasn't right but he was happy being wrong.
Late nights he prowled record shops disguised in a hat and giant coat. Luckily the customers looked mostly the same and even smelled a little of goat.
He snapped up Christmas records from country to jazz. Even progressive rock Christmas with Greg Lake and Patrick Moraz. He bought more Bing Crosby than anyone shout have. He was together for Christmas with the muppets and Henry Deutchendorf. Krampus almost got Hanson but a girl made a quick grab.
Riding home the station played Christmas too, Oakridge Boys Christmas from 1982. Listening to the music he basked in peace, but soon he would be down to business so he switched on number of the beast.
Image taken from Nothing is too hard for Bob
Late nights he prowled record shops disguised in a hat and giant coat. Luckily the customers looked mostly the same and even smelled a little of goat.
He snapped up Christmas records from country to jazz. Even progressive rock Christmas with Greg Lake and Patrick Moraz. He bought more Bing Crosby than anyone shout have. He was together for Christmas with the muppets and Henry Deutchendorf. Krampus almost got Hanson but a girl made a quick grab.
Riding home the station played Christmas too, Oakridge Boys Christmas from 1982. Listening to the music he basked in peace, but soon he would be down to business so he switched on number of the beast.
Image taken from Nothing is too hard for Bob
Hicks Road Part 2
I am not sure how to describe what this post will be. I guess it is sort of a pictorial tour of a recent trip over Hicks road. This is in part to clarify my previous post and in part to give out of town friends a trip down memory lane.
I started from Coleman and Curtner and then quickly made the turn onto hicks. You can see the light in the picture to the side. It really doesn't show anything but if you see this sort of sign you are in the right place.
Much of the drive is pretty standard country road sort of fair. It has some climbs and falls but it pretty smooth in the beginning. On this drive i am starting on the Curtner side and driving into New Almaden.
There are a few houses on the trip and looking left into the creek side there are actually a few horse stables. The last building on the left is one of these stables.
I started from Coleman and Curtner and then quickly made the turn onto hicks. You can see the light in the picture to the side. It really doesn't show anything but if you see this sort of sign you are in the right place.
early in the drive |
There are a few houses on the trip and looking left into the creek side there are actually a few horse stables. The last building on the left is one of these stables.
Monday, September 12, 2011
Krampus for Christmas part 19
Krampus had a bird on thanksgiving, of which he kept three. The monster wasn't sure if he was Republican or Democrat or even Canadian you see. But on all he flame broiled a nicely stuffed Tom; Eating it right there with the dog on the lawn. Krampus wasn't too formal with the feast. A ping pong table in the back yard was fine for the beast.
The pies were made of jack lanterns long since spoiled. He made the crust from scratch, a long night he toiled.
The days of the feasts he caught a little nap. Then waited by the mall and set a little trap. Black Friday shoppers tasted the best full of thanksgiving dinners from their toes to their chest. They were concerned with deals not with there kids. They wouldn't mind just a nibble; so he waited and hid.
The pies were made of jack lanterns long since spoiled. He made the crust from scratch, a long night he toiled.
The days of the feasts he caught a little nap. Then waited by the mall and set a little trap. Black Friday shoppers tasted the best full of thanksgiving dinners from their toes to their chest. They were concerned with deals not with there kids. They wouldn't mind just a nibble; so he waited and hid.
Krampus for Christmas part 18
As a monster, Krampus didn't do small talk. He wasn't a sneak nor was he sly, to him truth was given never a lie. when he spoke he was hard and forceful yet Idunn didn't cry. This girl was not scared and Krampus wanted to know why.
What did she want, the beast still hoped she'd leave. When she said to be friend Krampus gave her a reprieve.
I'm a monster he said with a growl. And if your bad I'll eat you, beat you, you'll howl.
But Idunn stood her ground and still holding out her hand without a sound.
What did she want, the beast still hoped she'd leave. When she said to be friend Krampus gave her a reprieve.
I'm a monster he said with a growl. And if your bad I'll eat you, beat you, you'll howl.
But Idunn stood her ground and still holding out her hand without a sound.
Friday, September 09, 2011
Krampus for Christmas part 17
With watching Krampus for so long Idunn had grown brave and strong. One day she decided to march down, look the monster in the eye, extend a hand and say hi. When she did Krampus was confused, Kids should be scared of him, not amused. At first he huffed then finally he said hello. Being nice as a monster could through really he wished she'd go.
Idunn introduced herself by name waiting politely for the beast to do the same. When Krampus finally did it was curt. Idunn not being afraid, the monster was really hurt. But she kept at him with a smile and the innocence of a child.
Christmas lights glowed around the eaves, with Krampus making small talk hoping the girl would leave. She had been good and the beast couldn't eat her. Santa wouldn't allow it of that Krampus was sure.
Idunn introduced herself by name waiting politely for the beast to do the same. When Krampus finally did it was curt. Idunn not being afraid, the monster was really hurt. But she kept at him with a smile and the innocence of a child.
Christmas lights glowed around the eaves, with Krampus making small talk hoping the girl would leave. She had been good and the beast couldn't eat her. Santa wouldn't allow it of that Krampus was sure.
Thursday, September 08, 2011
Krampus for Christmas part 16
The Ahwahnee held a fine Christmas feast, and all the medieval merriment called to the beast. Krampus visited in the dark of night, knowing his monstrous site would cause a fright. He peered in through the windows cracking as sash, and dinner on left overs and trash. He enjoyed the evening it was all so fun, but where was the terror. Of fear there was none.
The peacock pie had been served to all when Krampus stormed the hall. He battered the house keep and flattened th' lord of misrule. All the fancy dinners would remember this yule. He grabbed a banker and gave him the lash. Buggering his wife with a rod made of ash.
When all the nice banners lay broken and torn, Krampus flew away his welcome growing worn. Hooting and hollering a menacing "Grus vom Krampus" that night.
The peacock pie had been served to all when Krampus stormed the hall. He battered the house keep and flattened th' lord of misrule. All the fancy dinners would remember this yule. He grabbed a banker and gave him the lash. Buggering his wife with a rod made of ash.
When all the nice banners lay broken and torn, Krampus flew away his welcome growing worn. Hooting and hollering a menacing "Grus vom Krampus" that night.
Richard Scarry's Puzzletown part 2
I recently noticed an auction that included some puzzletown pieces I did not recognize. Looking into the auction I found they were not actually Richard Scarry but rather Sesame street themed. Intrigued I started doing some research. Apparently in 1977 Playskool created the second round of Richard Scarry sets, as well as this Sesame Street set. The official product name was Sesame Street Neighborhood. I was able to win the auction and was told the woodboard pieces work just fine with the puzzletown grid floors. I will keep you updated when I get my package.
Here is a link to someone selling the toy that does a good job of describing the product. It seems to work a little differently being designed to use woodboard cut outs as the figures rather than those of the Richard Scarry sets. Sesame street uses little green feet pieces that hold the character pieces.
The houses themselves use foot and roof system. The roofs are single piece rather than build, as in the Richard scarry sets.
My original post on puzzletown can be found HERE
I just wrote up a third post on puzzletown and you can find it HERE
There is also a brand new post here.
Here is a link to someone selling the toy that does a good job of describing the product. It seems to work a little differently being designed to use woodboard cut outs as the figures rather than those of the Richard Scarry sets. Sesame street uses little green feet pieces that hold the character pieces.
The houses themselves use foot and roof system. The roofs are single piece rather than build, as in the Richard scarry sets.
My original post on puzzletown can be found HERE
I just wrote up a third post on puzzletown and you can find it HERE
There is also a brand new post here.
Wednesday, September 07, 2011
Krampus for Christmas part 15
With all the carolling and shopping Krampus paid a visit to the mall. A lone monster was too few for the task, so he gathered young men and for each a mask. Furry suits, chains, a bell. He thought his army of Kampusse looked just swell. They stormed the Spencer's and Orange Julius stores, spanking all the maidens dress up like whores. Young kids were mostly spared but if they weren't the parents wouldn't have cared. In line for Santa they were mostly brats and deserved a few swings from the Krampusse's bats. When security came Krampus gave a call and the shaggy gang fled the mall.
Bron Yr Aur
drawing up all the things I love I fell into the car. Gathering my connections and setting them to place. Not in leaving but in reminding and telling. Telling the loved of places once loved and remembered. Streets shadowed with tales high and bold, that fall short when tried to be told. Hills dark in dusk laid out like a golden breast made smokey with forgotten fires upon behest.
Tuesday, September 06, 2011
Krampus for Christmas part 14
Great claws turned over a tasty shank and pulled off a forgotten sneaker with a yank. The monster was cooked up a mouth watering stew with an ill behaved eight year old or two. He threw them in cloths and all, merrily chuckling when they started to bawl. Then Krampus tossed onions and kale; tasting the soup to the last of the wails. Finally done Krampus thought, boiled up kids sure hit the spot.
T'was a special feast for Leif Erickson's day. Though Krampus was Germanic , he feasted anyway. Odin was a friend from long ago, he hadn't seen him lately; why he didn't know. He dressed up a viking and pillaged neighborhood trash finally coming home with a rash.
T'was a special feast for Leif Erickson's day. Though Krampus was Germanic , he feasted anyway. Odin was a friend from long ago, he hadn't seen him lately; why he didn't know. He dressed up a viking and pillaged neighborhood trash finally coming home with a rash.
Working on a chain gang
The more I have been involved in the Scrum process the more I begin to question it. While I think the small teams and close work is great, I question if the process is sustainable. Also the chaos implicit to Scrum makes it difficult for QA to maintain standard checks and balances.
I see something of the drive to turn people into machines in both of these problems, but more so the problem with sustaining a scrum team. People are great at self organization for change, that is the base state of every ecosystem; not balance. This makes scrum the magic bullet to many problems. Rip down the bs and let people do, it works every time. Maintaining this is where it falls apart. The goal must be greater than the individual and people come together and succeed.
In the on going work of several scrum sprints the individual begins to reassert itself. This is where I see problems, at least for high level team members. When you are focused on functional work you are diminishing your strategic and growth level tasks. In throwing out process scrum also throws out career growth, beyond senior levels at least. I feel even HR must embrace Scrum and modify career path if scrum teams are to continue beyond a year and a half.
Turning to QA. I am a quality assurance engineer so it is my focus in Scrum. In our team we are often executing work of a similar nature, to add speed we have thrown out test cases as the work is very similar from instance to instance. Really this is not a good thing, we are discarding solid qa practices for execution. It works again because we are cogs in a repeating machine. When we do tackle a new project we often stumble for not having used those very tools we have discarded.
I see something of the drive to turn people into machines in both of these problems, but more so the problem with sustaining a scrum team. People are great at self organization for change, that is the base state of every ecosystem; not balance. This makes scrum the magic bullet to many problems. Rip down the bs and let people do, it works every time. Maintaining this is where it falls apart. The goal must be greater than the individual and people come together and succeed.
In the on going work of several scrum sprints the individual begins to reassert itself. This is where I see problems, at least for high level team members. When you are focused on functional work you are diminishing your strategic and growth level tasks. In throwing out process scrum also throws out career growth, beyond senior levels at least. I feel even HR must embrace Scrum and modify career path if scrum teams are to continue beyond a year and a half.
Turning to QA. I am a quality assurance engineer so it is my focus in Scrum. In our team we are often executing work of a similar nature, to add speed we have thrown out test cases as the work is very similar from instance to instance. Really this is not a good thing, we are discarding solid qa practices for execution. It works again because we are cogs in a repeating machine. When we do tackle a new project we often stumble for not having used those very tools we have discarded.
Friday, September 02, 2011
Krampus for Christmas part 13
Krampus broke down the door, storming into the room. Throwing over a table which landed with a boom. Some kids fled in terror others shrieked in fright. It was only Idunn who squeeled in delight. He gave only a glance bounding toward Miss Deroon. He hefted her up and sprang from the room. To the window tearing up the sash, it exploded with a crash.
Ms Teacher had been bad and Krampus had the cure. It was a punishment she would enjoy of that be sure. I wasn't the date she envisioned after Krampus saved her at the bar, but it was one she liked more by far.
Ms Teacher had been bad and Krampus had the cure. It was a punishment she would enjoy of that be sure. I wasn't the date she envisioned after Krampus saved her at the bar, but it was one she liked more by far.
Hello its me
I sort of messed up with my wife the other night. I went off to do my role playing game instead of helping her when she needed me. I feel like crap about it. I am just so dumb when it comes to that sort of thing. Its like I don't get any of the clues even when they are screamed at me. I don't know why people are such a mystery to me. It's like I am an alien and I just don't understand even though I have been watching all my life. I want to be a kind person, well no really I don't. I want to love the people I love and treat them great. I am content being an observer to the people I don't.
I know its hard to get through to me, Sometimes its just as hard for me to get something out. Its like there is a wall between me and people and I want my people to know I love them and don't want to be this way.
I acted live a fool before when something came up with the gaming and now my wife wont tell me when she needs. I feel like a jack ass whenever this comes up and it keeps coming up. I wish planet Jim got the messages from planet Earth.
I know its hard to get through to me, Sometimes its just as hard for me to get something out. Its like there is a wall between me and people and I want my people to know I love them and don't want to be this way.
I acted live a fool before when something came up with the gaming and now my wife wont tell me when she needs. I feel like a jack ass whenever this comes up and it keeps coming up. I wish planet Jim got the messages from planet Earth.
Thursday, September 01, 2011
Tin Man
Lift this sunward veil and Let me enchant this spell. Draw out the sage and straw from the hills and send them to me. Give me a cold wind after weary day, I'm wary of oncoming light. Dream come up on my waking, existent only in night. Scarecrow give me warning if I'm headed wrong. Don't tell me to the morning of two suns in the sky. Moon mirror my heart now radiate like a secret sun, on all the day is done. Scarecrow give me warning
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