Thursday, September 06, 2012

The muse returns to mind

The mind and dreams return to their wanting, on these later days of the year.  As if roused and rounded up by a memory of school and it's worrisome start.  Through all that comes an end and the last days here.  The flight of wild wonder for fairer shores.  Amid this moldering the melancholia creeps and I remember you.  My need and myself.

Broken free of the wider ordering understanding these months ride mutable and grey.  Casting of it's mantle of beauty for one of discord and decay even the land wanders in change.  All Autumn colors and doubt fill us through and through. Leaving me alone but for wishing for you. 

In this I dream myself Aloysius and you Nicene my queen, but then I realize somethings amiss and the tale finally begins.  I am lost from the beginning struggling for a connection to you. Lashing out like a hurt animal that doesn't know what to do.  Here I am only a man or rather only the man I am.  Then there is some quest that is transformative and I'm able to speak to you. But the truth is there is no journey that will fix my failing like that. No growth is slow and I am a lazy sod reaching far beyond my grasp.

No comments: