Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Krampus for Christmas part 123: Clean up part 4

The neighborhood was alive with folks wandering about.  All singing to each other most sounded as if pained by gout.  With all the caroling and shopping Krampus paid a visit to the mall.  The monster loved carols but the singing left him appalled.  For Krampus plans a lone monster was too few for the task; so he rounded up young men and gave each a mask.  They all had furry suites, chains and a bell.  Now Krampus had an army of Krampusse to raise a little hell.  The monsters stormed the Spencer's and Orange Julius stores; spanking all the maidens dressed up like little whores.  The young children for the most part were spared, but if they weren't their parents wouldn't have cared.  In line for Santa they were mostly brats and deserved a few swings from the Krampusse's bats. When Security finally came Krampus gave a call and the band of shaggy outlaws fled the mall.

Fleeing Krampus spied Idunn in line, waiting for Santa her parents glowering from behind.  The little girl's smile lighted her parent’s gloom, Papa stepping between the beast and Idunn.  Krampus smiled a fang filled grin then knocked over a big trash bin.  Her parents wondered, looking down at the little girl.  Mommy nearly fainted when Idunn's smile started to curl.   Mommy was about to ask how she knew the giant brute, just then the elves hauled Idunn up to the fat man in the suit.  Claus asked what she would like and posed for a pictures.  Then he offered her parents advice to reign her in stricter.  Santa gave Idunn a cane and hustled here away.  He said he would see her soon on Christmas Day.  Glancing back Santa gave her a wink.  He knew Krampus too Idunn started to think.

Back to the furry gang Krampusse all were on the run.  Each headed for an exit after a little fun.  Knocking over displays with choruses of merry shouts.  Krampus himself laid a store greeter out.  He called to Krampus "Happy Holidays" and the monsters attitude took a turn for the worse.  For Krampus no other Christmasy greeting was worse.  Our monster had put only Christmas in his evil heart and of other holidays he was determined to have no part.  Sure Krampus remember all the ancient traditions of times gone and old.  He often mistook Santa for Odin if truth be told. He remember time before it was called Christmas, the wintry Yule. Before he was reined in by Santa, Krampus was even more cruel!

The gang broke into the movie house interrupting the show.  It was something about Pine tree Vermont hoping it was going to snow.  The monstrous band lashed the crowd howling for their blood.  Krampus mauled the Mayor, he was known for graft and sling of the mud. The Krampusse devoured the concession stand even if the popcorn sort of stale. Glass and candy was scattered on the floor.  Everything gone, Krampus smiled contently upon the gore.  It was a gala night before the carnage came, now the rich of the splendid town lay broken and in pain. Krampus knew most were crooks and got what they deserved.  He was happy for the Jolly backdrop on which his vengeance was served.  It was the sort of night to be spoken of for years.  Krampus would swell with pride when he felt a burning of his ears.  His band of krampusse he freed on the unsuspecting town.  Heading off to sleep in a cap and long night gown.

With Christmas a few weeks away, Krampus was up with the first light of day. The big monster thought of the little men working in Santa's shop.  Once he tried to help but the fat man told him to stop.  Krampus wasn't an elf nor good with his hands but Krampus helped charity in ways only he can.  In big toy stores all filled with Christmas rush; Krampus encouraged shoppers donate or blood would gush.  At Christmas “Toys for Tots” left out a bin, Krampus made sure everyone tossed a couple toys in.  The monster didn't talk or say a word, just swished his switch lightly the message clearly heard. A couple of teenagers tried to sneak by they were unhurt mostly, just a blackened eye.

One night Idunn trotted up with an unwrapped toy, the monster cracked a little smile to the girls bounding joy.  Her parents hurried off worried Krampus may eat her, but Idunn knew there was no reason to fear.  The hulking brute had grown fond of the girl. Idunn and he would talk over the fence all hours of the night, and then she would climb through her window quick as a squirrel. Idunn leaving the beast for her soft warm bed; Krampus to his dog house that didn't cover his head. Idunn's parents wouldn't understand; if they knew these nightly visits would be banded. 

The little girl gone, Krampus again enforced the rules.  Krampus thought of charity important for the Yule.  The store stood on the classy side of town; He didn't target the poor for this Christmas shake down.  All had plenty to give or got the whip, it was funny how the richest usually ended with a fat lip.  Krampus looked over toys in the bin, somewhat ambivalent it was hard to read his grin.  Too few gifts for the older boys and girl, Christmas wasn't easy for the older orphans of the world.  No music players or big kid bikes, but plenty gift for the smallest of tike's.  Krampus stalked about the isles, tossing toys into unsuspecting carts, and then instructing shoppers where to donate with a menacing smile.  Shoppers complied in fear, buying music players or losing their ears.  The monster ordered one suited man to buy up video games or face his wrath.  He bought out the store earning the beasts approving Laugh. Near closing time Krampus appraised the haul, smiling happily the bins filled all.  He could go home his work complete, next year maybe he and Santa couple compete.  Many kids would have a happy year, now it was time for Krampus to make the others tremble in fear.

This time of year the Ahwahnee hotel held a fine Christmas feast, and all the medieval merriment called to the beast. The dining room was decorated so festive it glowed.  All in the theme of a Christmas at Bracebridge hall of old.  Some sort of artist had organized the first dinner, many years back when Krampus was much thinner.  The monster visited in the dark of night, knowing his monstrous site would cause a fright. He peered in through the windows cracking as sash, and dined on left overs and trash. He enjoyed the evening it was all so fun, but where was the terror. Of fear there was none.

The peacock pie had been served to one and all when Krampus burst from the window and stormed the hall. He battered the house keep and flattened the Lord of Misrule. All the fancy dinners would remember this Yule. He grabbed a banker and gave him the lash. Buggering his wife with a rod made of ash.  Krampus tore at a tuba player and wrapped brass about him like a bow.  The monster preferred guitar, this was a critique of the show.  Pipers and players neither were spared, Flutes rammed down throats and up other places; you would have glared.  His hoof smashed tables shattering plates, if you love carnage you'd say it was just great.  Blows felled a bus boy like a tree; he was embezzling from the bar.  Krampus's switch lashed the evil, them running near and far.  Then beast was on them with a mighty bound; whips and cries a musical sound.When all the nice banners lay broken and torn, Krampus flew away his welcome having grown worn. A last look Krampus surveyed the damage with delight. Hooting and hollering a menacing "Grus vom Krampus" into the night!

This late In the season Krampus loved to bake. His were the worst inedible ill flavored sort of fruity cakes. Krampus delivered them to the neighbor's doorsteps with a toss.  Some shattered across the lawn but the monster wouldn't mourn their loss. Cake broken windows were none of Krampus's concern.  He did the same thing last Christmas and the neighbors really should have learned.  The cakes were hard and really not for eating; more a friendly seasons greeting.   Krampus didn't shell the nuts just leaving them in for a surprise.  To some he added bolts and hot wheels you should have seen the kiddies eyes.  In January the dentist fixed many teeth, he was so grateful he often sent Krampus a wreath. 

Krampus's cookies tasted vaguely of frogs.  No one dared eating them not even local dogs.  He pumpkin bread alone was delicious and that he didn't share.  We only knew of those from the mouth watering smell dangling in the air.  The monster always had Figgie Pudding waiting on the boil.  He dumped it on carolers leaving them flame broiled.  Krampus often baked in coins despite the cost.  They were a choking hazard several lives were lost.  Then came the mincemeat flavored pie, though it wasn't meat and Krampus wondered why.  The beast added tripe to make it true to name, the few who ate it wondered who was to blame.  The pies were horrid terrible foul; left on doorsteps when the Beast did prowl.  Once Krampus had added candied apples to a church bake sale, they were infested with worms, also pretty stale.  In the caramel glaze they looked fine, but after a few bites kiddies retched and whined.

His neighborhood baking was the talk of the town, spoken in hushed whispers with a grim frown.  Few knew Krampus the beast lurked; they thought the food from a prankster jerk.  Only Idunn watched the monster bake, Krampus in a hair net for cleanness sake.  The girl and monster chatted through the fence, Krampus making cookies full of mince.  They shared some of his pumpkin cakes; it was the only tasty dish of all he makes.  Idunn even helped deliver the treats late one night.  She crept out late even through knowing it wasn't right.  For the most part Krampus's cooking was not enjoyed; just another Christmas sorrow for all the girls and boys.

A couple of days later Idunn and the monster left their houses late in the evening.  Krampus had a special treat that needed seeing.  Krampus and Idunn wandered the in wonder all through the park; even though all was turned down and dark.  The Little scenes of Christmastide, all laid still long past closing time.  The beast looked on smiling at how with no people no peddlers it got Christmas right.  In rain lights shined on the roadway all looking lonely in depth of night.  With the power on elves hammered out toys in a sweatshop for the good girls and boys.  Reindeer trotted in a stable each in a stall.  These were ancient animatronic Christmas scenes once owned by the mall. Some new others old and dingy, they should be cleaned but the city was stingy.  Idunn happily squealed the about the virtues of every scene, the girl so happy Krampus smiled not the least bit mean. She shouldn't have been out this late.  Certainly not with a monster, but she thought it was great. He parents had taken her, at day to see the park, but now it had a new magic, with a monster, in the dark. A forest of lighted trees decks by local rotary clubs; shined merrily lighting the way to local pubs.  Of all Idunn liked the little Noah's Ark, she said it was the best of the whole Christmas In the Park.  The monster smiled remembering the traditions start.  A gift from the cities mortician, the irony was not lost in Krampus's heart. 

These late hours the sausage stand watered Krampus's maw.  He found a few left over links in a can with trash and straws. Idunn said no when Krampus offered a bite, the beast wanted her to eat but she put up a fight. the chilly air gusts were odd for a city of the bay, and drop of rain sent the pair on their way. They left wind rushing through Krampus's hair, upon an old motorbike sidecar equipped for flair.  Idunn huddled wrapped up with a giant helmet on top.  She shouted with joy at Krampus with every stop. On through the houses alight with Christmas light bulbs shining against the night.  He turned down unknown streets to see houses made up with zeal.  Most streets had but a few but one street he stopped skidding with a squeal.  All the houses even the trees shined out blanketing the scene in weight.  Krampus eyes shone thinking the view was great. Like new fell snow drooping down every bough! When Idunn saw she gasped a great big wow! This was a street to remember and check in on again.  Then they rode off Krampus with his new found friend.

A couple of nights later the sirens wailed as Krampus cackled through the night; speeding through the city finally the last of the cop cars disappeared from sight.  The chase started and was over quick the monster on his motor bike along with Saint Nick.  The police saw a monster on the bike and gave chase.  Santa didn't want to be seen with Krampus and hid his face.  Claus was setting loose Krampus on a kid from the mall.  While visiting Santa the brat screamed and kick Santa in the balls.  These were the nights Krampus loved his Christmas work.  When Father Christmas wasn't being such a goody goody jerk.  The monster enjoyed righteously beating kids.  Santa directing the punishment based on who much bad they did.

Under the cloudy sky Krampus spied on the house from afar, Santa all the time hid in the motorcycle sidecar. The stockings were hung and they watch the fire crack merry, unaware they were being stalked by someone quit scary.  A Cloven hoof kicked in the door and the family gasped in horror.  The children shrieked dropping presents and candy.   The monster grabbed the boy and looked at the mother somewhat randy.  On orders, Santa said not a mark, so Krampus beat the bastard with a bag of oranges and tan bark.  After the child moaned in a pulp he looked up at the mom and she gave a loud gulp. The cop cars were her release, who knows what she would have done with the beast.  The pair rode off after the damage was done. Krampus smiling, he thought it had been fun.  They made their way to another house later that eve.  Krampus consulted with Santa if the mystery house should get a reprieve.  The pair looked in wondering what the family was about.  The tree was decked out as if nothing was ajar, except the top had no angel not even a star.  Presents were nestled under the tree with care, in the hopes that the winter solstice would soon be there.  They wondered why the family pretended through the Christmas Yule.  Maybe they thought denying their kids presents was far too cruel. 

Santa remembered the Parents from when they were tots.  They were good but their Christmas lists demanded a lot.  The children Santa had never visited before, and Krampus didn't remember leaving them in gore. Something was wrong they thought on the matter.  Krampus would investigate while Santa ate cookies and got fatter.  Claus left the issue to the beast and Krampus considered them a future feast.  They left knowing Krampus would be back.  The monster was already planning his attack.

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